Casual Games for Sad Old Fucks #1

Three reviewlets of three games I've been playing recently. All were played on the Playstation 3, all are available on the Xbox and probably the Wii as well. Who knows, some might even be out there for the PC (one is). All are casual games, because that's what I'm playing at the moment, simple as that.

Monopoly Streets
£30 at Amazon
My latest purchase, what can I say, it's Monopoly. It's presented in 3D with excellent cartoony animations, it's all hopelessly family friendly and there's plenty of boards and pieces to earn to add to the interest (probably not enough pieces, truth be told). There are various game modes, from Official rules to Fast Game to Jackpot offering various rulesets. Graphics and sound are fine. So, is all hunky-dory in the Monopoly Streets world? Well no. Whilst it plays a great game you can sometimes get lost amongst the tight, close-in shots and feel a bit disconnected. But far, far more importantly, there's a big problem in the online mode where if one player drops the game ends immediately and you're sent to the main menu. This is shit. Frankly. That it got past QC is a sign that a fuck-witted numbskull was allowed to wank into the mix at some stage and left their stain behind. Patch please, quickly.

Rapala Pro Bass Fishing
£40 at Play, including rod peripheral
So to fishing, or Yankee fishing, without proper baits and that. That aside, this is an excellent game - probably the best fishing game ever, though to be honest that isn't saying much, I know. The big draw of this game is the rod peripheral which uses tilt switches and a reel (fitted either way for the right- and left-handed) to mimic the actions of a real rod and reel. It's not bad either. Obviously there's no feedback (the package is too cheap) but as you wave the rod about to move your lure in predetermined patterns or fight your fish you can squint and just about believe you're doing something approaching fishing. Visuals are great, sound good and the single player game seems quite well balanced and fun. The problem again lies in the multiplayer arena, and this time the problem is simple: there is no multiplayer. This could of been so fun and simple, fishing in a lake against friends or strangers for a predetermined time. Activision are indeed cunts.

Worms2: Armageddon
£13 or so, Playstation Network
This is part of the old Worms series that started in the 1990s, this is the cheapest game by far in these 3 games, this is in 2D and this is by far the best game I'm writing about today. In addition, and least importantly, this is the one game also available on the PC. You know the score, it's the old BBC computer artillery game with amazingly surreal landscapes, weapons ranging from the mundane to the insane and worms; lovely cute little worms with adorable voices. It's savage as hell, especially online where no prisoners are taken. The only problem with this game are the players - so many scurrilous toads are happy to besmirch their good name and honour by quitting games when they're losing that it can be quite rare to finish a game online. Apart from that it's wonderful, gloriously pretty in 720p and most importantly fun as hell.

There you have it, two not bad but flawed games and one prime jewel amongst games. If I had one general comment it would be this: please let me play my own music in my own games. None of the above let you play your own and that annoys the hell out of me. This should be such a simple requirement every game should allow it. The Xbox 360 has had this since year dot at system level. That's probably why these 3 ports don't have it.

That's all for now, poodle-tip.