Gran Turismo 5 (GT5) update 1.05

Yes, I'm reviewing a game update. Why? Because I can, and because I'm quite impressed with what it offers. As you'll know if you've read my previous review of the game itself, I was pretty pleased with it though there were some problems. This update doesn't address many of them but it really doesn't matter. In the intervening time I've really fell in love with the game and play it regularly. This update offers a lot more functionality and fun. I'm still shit on-line, mind you.

By far the best thing in 1.05 is the ability to backup your save to a USB device. This essential omission was rendered vitally important by the fact that going on-line can result in lock-ups that occasionally corrupt your save. Whilst the lock-ups happen a lot less now it's still great to know your progression can be saved. You still can't swap saves with others, which is good, but it's not known whether they are locked to account or PS3 unit - pretty vital if you change PS3s and want to keep your save.

Seasonal Events are brilliant. They offer a lot of fun, close racing and lots of credit and xp. They are updated regularly, are open for around two weeks and let you race, time trial or drift. They tend to have very strict regulations and most of the race events restrict you to a single vehicle that you can hardly tune at all. This leads to very close, tough racing. I can only get silver at best but it's great fun trying to find just a second or two more out of a track.

The new Hot Car dealership offers you access to 12 cars (and trucks) that will help complete particular events. These will be occasionally updated. In addition, you now get credits and xp for on-line races where your distance driven and number of wins are now saved. Mine still reads 0. Oh, and the shadows have changed - they're slightly smoother but still pretty shitty.

Finally, until January 11th, we get more rewards for doing A- and B-Spec events. A really good gesture to wrap up a really good update. What's impressed me most is that these additions, for the main part, are neither fixes nor things they wanted to put in the game, they are genuinely new things to do. And they're a lot of fun. Nice one Polyphony Digital.

Playstation blog on the update.

Gran Turismo 5 (GT5) Review

I come to this game, as I do all games now, with the mind and body of a 40+ old gamer with very little twitch muscle left and all manual dexterity fading with age. Whatever enjoyment I can find in a game tends to be tempered with the idea I can never do well at the higher levels of the game and the fact that I'll not be winning on-line. So enjoy your read ahead with that in mind.

GT5 is the racing game that Jap studio Polyphony Digital have been making since before the Playstation 3 launched. Its tag is the real driving simulator and it's by that that it must be judged. Don't expect flashy explosive graphics, tracks with spurting lava, boosters and so on - this is a sim and it deals with real cars going around realistic -often real - tracks.

So how did they do? Well, they did pretty well but the game is not without some problems.

The menu system, for example, is an annoying piece of shit that should of been changed completely shortly after design with the subsequent public torture and execution of the designer and his entire family. It's unintuitive, doesn't group things where you would want them and forces you to endlessly traipse backwards and forwards as you just want to race.

The graphics and sound are great. With the exception of the trees which are a bit polygonesque and the shadows which are as bad as anything from the PS2 you can imagine. The engine does run at 1080p 60FPS though, so perhaps it's easy to understand why some compromises had to be made. Sound, on my system at least, comes out as Dolby Digital 5.1 48k and is as crisply appointed as one could want. The music on the other hand is techno, lightweight synth jazz, cheapo classical and generally a bit shitty and uninspired. Like it was chosen by someone who doesn't like music very much. There is no option to use your own music in the game - for shame, Polyphony Digital.

There are over 1000 cars in the game - one of its unique selling points, and due to implementation one of its critics' biggest bugbears. There are around 200 premium model cars and therefore around 800 standard model cars. The difference? The former are modelled in detail, look amazing and offer custom dashboards if you like to race inside the car. Standard models contain less detail and no dashboard. That said, they actually look quite good to my eye, just a little plain at times - it depends a lot on the specific car.

Damage modelling comes in two flavours in GT5: costume and mechanical. Both become progressively unlocked as you increase your level. Costume looks a bit crap, with areas of your car taking on a sort of distorted plastic look. Mechanical damage unlocks quite late on and actually effects your racing performance. So I can't tell you much about that apart from to say that update 1.03 just became available tonight which adds mechanical damage to on-line racing via the options.

Handling is a fucking dream, thank fuck. This is the very core of any racing game, without which any amount of snazzy graphics, explosive damage modelling and car tuning options would completely fall apart. It took me 3-4 days for the handling to click into place for me, and when it did it was a pure joy to be able to sling cars round corners, powerslide and all the other cool car stuff we love. It is not forgiving though, muck up your line or braking at a corner in a powerful car and you'll spin or go off-course - this is just how it should be in a sim.

GT5 is played in one of three main modes: GT Life, Arcade and On-line. GT Life is the full experience and involves entering races to win money and experience points to go up levels to get you faster cars which can enter more races, etc. You start with a small amount of cash and no cars and have to make your way up the rankings. It works well. Arcade gives you access to most courses and cars and is standalone with no xp or money involved. On-line is currently unstable and can cause your save game file to corrupt - though maybe 1.03 has fixed this. There's no info currently.

Two salient points here. The AI is rubbish. You'll either win by miles or be all but last, depending on the relative speed of the car. And the B-spec mode, where you build up a fictitious racer and issue race commands to him, is a massive time and credit sink and nothing else.

This is a massive game, I've only scratched the surface myself and have only been able to write of a few of the more important areas and more annoying issues. I've not told you about tuning, the used car dealership, special events, replay and photo mode, paint, race mods and so on. Sorry about that, but did you really want to read much more?

GT5 is a game that excels - mostly - in the areas that are most important to it: driving a car around a track. It offers little panache or flair and has some problems that are really unforgivable in a game with such a long development. That said, they appear to be listening and are bringing out updates at a rate of knots. I'm impressed, I enjoy the game and would suggest anyone with an interest in driving games buys it. I wish they'd fix the on-line though, that really is cuntish corrupting your save file.. oh and you can't back it up, it's copy-protected.

UPDATE: I was wrong, you can use your own music. It's hidden away in options/audio. Works well, called 'Personal Music' inside the game. Online seems much more stable to me with the new patch (1.03).

Casual Games for Sad Old Fucks #1

Three reviewlets of three games I've been playing recently. All were played on the Playstation 3, all are available on the Xbox and probably the Wii as well. Who knows, some might even be out there for the PC (one is). All are casual games, because that's what I'm playing at the moment, simple as that.

Monopoly Streets
£30 at Amazon
My latest purchase, what can I say, it's Monopoly. It's presented in 3D with excellent cartoony animations, it's all hopelessly family friendly and there's plenty of boards and pieces to earn to add to the interest (probably not enough pieces, truth be told). There are various game modes, from Official rules to Fast Game to Jackpot offering various rulesets. Graphics and sound are fine. So, is all hunky-dory in the Monopoly Streets world? Well no. Whilst it plays a great game you can sometimes get lost amongst the tight, close-in shots and feel a bit disconnected. But far, far more importantly, there's a big problem in the online mode where if one player drops the game ends immediately and you're sent to the main menu. This is shit. Frankly. That it got past QC is a sign that a fuck-witted numbskull was allowed to wank into the mix at some stage and left their stain behind. Patch please, quickly.

Rapala Pro Bass Fishing
£40 at Play, including rod peripheral
So to fishing, or Yankee fishing, without proper baits and that. That aside, this is an excellent game - probably the best fishing game ever, though to be honest that isn't saying much, I know. The big draw of this game is the rod peripheral which uses tilt switches and a reel (fitted either way for the right- and left-handed) to mimic the actions of a real rod and reel. It's not bad either. Obviously there's no feedback (the package is too cheap) but as you wave the rod about to move your lure in predetermined patterns or fight your fish you can squint and just about believe you're doing something approaching fishing. Visuals are great, sound good and the single player game seems quite well balanced and fun. The problem again lies in the multiplayer arena, and this time the problem is simple: there is no multiplayer. This could of been so fun and simple, fishing in a lake against friends or strangers for a predetermined time. Activision are indeed cunts.

Worms2: Armageddon
£13 or so, Playstation Network
This is part of the old Worms series that started in the 1990s, this is the cheapest game by far in these 3 games, this is in 2D and this is by far the best game I'm writing about today. In addition, and least importantly, this is the one game also available on the PC. You know the score, it's the old BBC computer artillery game with amazingly surreal landscapes, weapons ranging from the mundane to the insane and worms; lovely cute little worms with adorable voices. It's savage as hell, especially online where no prisoners are taken. The only problem with this game are the players - so many scurrilous toads are happy to besmirch their good name and honour by quitting games when they're losing that it can be quite rare to finish a game online. Apart from that it's wonderful, gloriously pretty in 720p and most importantly fun as hell.

There you have it, two not bad but flawed games and one prime jewel amongst games. If I had one general comment it would be this: please let me play my own music in my own games. None of the above let you play your own and that annoys the hell out of me. This should be such a simple requirement every game should allow it. The Xbox 360 has had this since year dot at system level. That's probably why these 3 ports don't have it.

That's all for now, poodle-tip.

Modnation Racers - a review of sorts

No-one of sane mind is ever going to claim that Modnation Racers (MNR) is the best game ever made. I don't even know if it's the best kart game ever made, having not played them all myself. Certainly plenty of other reviews have mentioned the rubbish attempt to add a story into the career game, the difficult career passage as the AI becomes mentally aggressive and above all the long loading times.

But it's a good game, there's no denying that, and to me, it's a great game. Those other reviews will tell you the cartoon graphics are great, sounds fine, menus workable and will then almost always turn to the modding tools, which are excellent.

That they miss out on the aspect that makes the game great is no surprise. The lot of the professional or semi-professional game reviewer is not always a happy one. There's not always time to spend dissecting the game as much as they could, as much as the games player does by the natural dint of his playing, for example.

So, I'm 517 on-line games in and have just won the trophy for winning 100 games (silver, btw) and would like to report in. What makes this game great is how balanced the on-line racing is. Seemingly every race ends with a tight finish, good players will always fight one another and you're never left miles behind simply going round an empty track. And this all seems a perfectly natural part of the game, not leveraged by any deus ex machina but just something that happens.

So if you have a PS3 (or PSP) and fancy a blast, get a copy of MNR and join me on-line.